The questions you only ask at 1am.

Answered at length, without a script and without calling anyone a villain. Read one, then find out how you decide.

• 7 minute readWhy you keep dating the same personDifferent names, same relationship. The reason is not bad luck and it is not your type. It is the part of choosing you have never watched yourself do.
• 8 minute readAm I ready to date again after divorce?Readiness after divorce is not a feeling and it is not a length of time. It is a short list of things that are either true about you or not yet true.
• 7 minute readChemistry and compatibility are not the same thingChemistry tells you the first 6 weeks will be good. Compatibility tells you year 4 will be. Here is how to test for the second one without killing the first.
• 7 minute readA situationship is a relationship with the definition left outEverything is present except the sentence that says what it is. That absence is not an accident, and it lasts exactly as long as you agree to it.
• 8 minute readWhy you lose interest the moment they like you backThe feeling collapses the week they become certain. That usually means your interest was running on uncertainty rather than on the person. Sometimes it means something else.
• 8 minute readTime is the wrong unit for this questionEveryone gives you a number. Nobody can tell you what the number is for. Here is what actually has to be true before you date again, and how to tell whether it is.
• 8 minute readYou are not attracting themThe word attract does a lot of work in that sentence, and all of it is protecting you. You are not a magnet. You are choosing, and then staying. Here is what the pull is made of.